Fun with emails


Long time, no post I know but bare with me. Ive been sitting on this for almost two months and I almost forgot about it. The back story is my friend got placed on a large listserve that was planning some dude's bachelor party. After a few days of getting random emails he decided to let me in on it. Of course I wanted to participate. I was giggling away at my computer just thinking of the possibilities. Ive provided screen snaps of how exactly this all went down. Here is our initial conversation about it. Note my obvious excitement about throwing around stripper jokes.

Short lull in the conversation. Ok ready? Here we go.

This is the first email that was forwarded to me. Its pretty mundane but it is funny to notice Pat is on the "IN" list, yet he has never responded to any emails...

Until now!!!!

This is the first email list that I was on, the previous one was forwarded to me. I could hardly contain myself at work because I was just waiting for that first response to Pat's email. I decided to jump the gun though and send out a special salutation to this email chain:

I almost lost my shit at my desk after rereading the ridiculousness and just picturing the faces of these guys. From their earlier emails I had them pegged as dorks. After the completion of our email interaction, I can say that these guys are probably pretty fun to hang out with.

Also adding to my enjoyment was that I added two friends, Tony and Kevin onto the listserve, because I know that they would get confused as shit too. I love causing confusion. I also love stereotyping people from Texas.

But then there was a response!

I thought this was pretty well played. Its obvious that not everyone knew each other so this was a perfect response.

Then I got a personal email from the guy who seemed to be running everything...poorly. To make it more amusing I imagined him frantic and exasperated, barely able to type out a coherent email to me. Like the world was about to end because some rogue emailer found their way into their chain.

First I had to send Josh aka "Loves to touch tips" a personal email to see if I could glean anymore funny out of him. He never responded. Asshole. But then I fired one off to Joseph, to see if I could freak him out a little more. He never wrote back either. Whatever, I probably would have made the party 10x better.

The man of honor, decides to chime in with his own thoughts on sword-fighting. This was also well played. Why is your brother such a douche?

I dont know why, but I thought this response was also really funny. Its probably because I pictured him as "Raaaaaandy" but with the voice of Apu from The Simpsons. Im not racist though, I swear.

Since I was already 0-2 on personal responses, the third time had to be a charm. I figured since me and Ayman shared an affinity for activities (CALL ME!!) that he would also be down with forts. "Moat ya later" doesnt really make sense, but if you cant tell, I was in a extremely goofy mood. I do still hold onto hope that when its time for Ayman's bachelor party that I am included in the activity planning. (Like laser tag! PEW^3)

Pat's friend Andy also had a good email. Not making this up, but when I read it for the first time I thought it was one of the randoms messing with us back. Not sure why, maybe it was a lack of reading comprehension since it has his name twice. Go seals.

This is when I knew the jig was up...

The real Pat Lockerd sounds like a real cool dude. I still crack up when I reread this. "Only hookers dying on this trip will be on purpose". Thats golden. I think I just found the title of my bachelor party.

After not getting any responses to my personal emails, I figured that this thing had to come to an end. I tried to go out with a bang and hopefully I did. No one responded to this either. Its ok, Ill catch up to them niggas in February. I KNOW WHERE YOU'RE PARTYING AT DUDES.

They neglected to take Pat off the listserve because he kept getting sporadic emails about the upcoming bachelor party. It was a fun ride while it lasted.

In other site news, Im getting my laptop fixed for Christmas, so I hope to revamp this by early January 2010. Like always, if you want me to write about a certain topic, just leave it in the comments. But nothing about Vampires. Thanks.


Kara said...

This is one of the most hilarious things I've read in awhile. Priceless.

rajesh ajakhan said...

Mate I nearly chocked on my mothers thong when reading this fuckery haha I love fucking with people maybe one day we could get together and run amock amongst the dregs of society my email

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